In Part 1 of Living Alive, I talked in general about what it means to live alive and out loud.  Today I want to talk more specifically about what that means for the Dominant and Inspiring personality styles.  (If you aren’t familiar with the Model of Human Behavior, you might want to go back and read some of those earlier postings.)  I will finish this series with the Supportive and Cautious styles in Part 3.

But, before I get into it, let me remind you that we are all a blend of all four personality styles.  The majority of people have at least two styles that are more predominant than the others.  Some have three more predominant styles.  And, a few have only one style that is dominant.  So, please keep that in mind as you read because more than one section may apply to you.

Living alive and out loud for the D (Dominant) type personality involves movement and forward motion.  Nothing is more frustrating for this style than to be stuck in status quo!  They need to feel as if progress is being made on whatever they may be trying to achieve.

Risk and change help the D style to feel alive.  They like to “shake things up,” do something daring, be on the front, cutting-edge of life.  They like to lead rather than follow, which keeps them pioneering.  These things energize them and make them want to do even more and keep pressing forward.

When that is not the case, D’s can spin out of control, feeling restless, agitated, pushy, and less and less tolerant.  Patience is not a natural quality for this style of individual anyway, but when this need for forward motion is denied, impatience rises quickly to the top of their emotional scale.

For those who are I-type (Inspiring) personalities, living alive and out loud includes lots of activities, interaction with others, and fun!  I’s don’t typically like to sit still.  They want to be on the go and involved in many different kinds of activities.  Nothing is more draining to them than inactivity or the inability to communicate and interact with others.

The I style is emotionally charged when their social calendar is full and there are many and varied opportunities to be with others.

When life isn’t fun for these individuals, they can become whiney and pouty.  And, if life remains stale for them, they can sink into depression.

I want to finish this section with a personal story.

My personality style is D/I/C (Dominant, Inspiring, Cautious) and all three of those characteristics are very strong in me, though I have slightly less of the Cautious type than the other two.  The S (Supportive) style is nearly negligible in my make up.  Both the D and I are Outgoing, and both the D and C are Task-Oriented.  These facts are important to my story.

I decided to step out and leave the security of a J-O-B and start my own speaking/training business.  While the thought of that was exciting, scary, and definitely pioneering for me, it also positioned me to work from home.  Alone.

And, if you have ever done anything like that yourself, you know that there is a lot of technical work to be done.  Websites to be built, social media connections to be made, copy written for those websites, and a million other tasks to be done.

Besides that, it is more difficult to walk away from work that needs to still be done when you work from home.  The beginning and closing work hours are not as set as when you work for someone else.

Anyway, I began to notice that my mindset was turning very negative.  I found it difficult to lay aside work.  It was always on my mind and the work never seemed to be complete.  I had to revise and re-visit many tasks I thought should be finished.  I became so task-focused that there was no time or room for fun.  Plus, the Cautious part of me wanted things to be perfect the first time.

I didn’t feel as though I was making any progress, nothing seemed to ever be perfect and finished, and life certainly wasn’t any fun!  I felt duller and duller.  I was not living alive and out loud!

When I began to understand what was going on, I had to make some adjustments.  I had to make myself take a break and purposely fill my mind with something besides work…at least for a little while.  I had to release my expectation of this kind of work ever being “done” and realize that it is all a fluid process.  I also had to give myself the opportunity to get out of the house and away from the desk so that I could meet people and do some activities that were fun and energizing to me.

Living alive and out loud requires that we know how we are “wired” and giving ourselves good self-care.  I may have remained stuck in that cycle of frustration and depression for much longer had I not understood what the inherent needs of my particular personality blend are and how to address them.

I encourage you to discover your own blend and learn how to work with it so that you can live alive and out loud, too!  (Don’t forget to read next week’s Part 3 in order to find your complete blend if you didn’t find it here.)

I am a speaker and trainer and would love to speak at your next event. To learn more about me, go to www.align90.com.

Tags: Personality