A couple of weeks ago the grandmother of one of my sons-in-law passed away and I attended the visitation. Then my cousin’s husband died over the weekend. That has caused me to think about death, funerals, and that whole process. Not in a morbid way…just thinking about the way we tend to do things when death occurs.

I wondered why it is that we wait until someone is gone to say nice things about them or why we wait until their funeral to send flowers. Oh, I understand that we do those things in order to honor them, but would it not be more meaningful to say and do those things when they are still alive? I’m sure family members of the deceased appreciate knowing what their loved one meant to those around them, but the person who is gone can’t hear those kind words or smell the fragrance of the flowers adorning their room. Why do we wait?

It made me realize that I don’t want that for myself. If I have blessed someone’s life, I want to know it now. If someone is going to send me flowers, I want to enjoy them while I can smell them and enjoy the beauty. When I’m gone, those things won’t matter to me.

It also made me realize that if I don’t want that for myself, why would I wait to tell those I care about how much they bless my life?

Here’s what I’ve decided…I’ve decided to begin writing notes to let those who have blessed me know about it. There are so many who have enriched my life and who don’t know it because I’ve held that blessing inside. I no longer want to withhold the kinds of words usually reserved for someone’s eulogy. I want them to hear it from me now, while they can still receive it.

On my recent birthday, several people wrote notes telling me how much I had meant to them and wishing me a happy birthday. Some of them were from friends I knew years ago and I was unaware they felt that way about me. Those words were like salve to my soul!

So, if I’ve meant something to you, please tell me now. If you would send flowers for my funeral, I would enjoy them so much more in the present than then. So would the others who have blessed your life in some way. Don’t wait until they are gone to say so.

And, don’t be surprised if you receive a note from me sometime in the future!